Posted by Sassy Soothsayer on January 25, 2001 at 15:56:20:
In Reply to: Re: Seen Alongside the Glimmerglass posted by Gnome Air Traffic Control on January 25, 2001 at 13:30:20:
:
: : : You! Up there hovering on that contraption! Get your keester down here and land that thing! RIGHT NOW! This the the gnome Senior Controller here at the Gnome Air Traffic Control Center
: : : and you are in violation of Colonial Regulations regarding safety in the airspace. First of all, you have NOT been cleared to enter restricted airspace. Nor have you contacted the tower and even requested clearance. Secondly, you are way under minimum height requirements for flight over populated areas, gnome choirs, and congested ponds. Thirdly, I can see NO registration number on that purple monstrosity you are flying,
: : : and I question its air worthiness, let alone the pilot's worthiness who by her own admission is NO lady! Why, with all these violations your license to fly has been REVOKED and you can just WALK through all that goose Wash-ta back where you came from!!! And if you give me any lip, why you can just find your keester slammed into the Gnome Colonial Big House and that is a heck of a misnomer lemmee tell ya. Gnome jails ain't known for their size. You'd be mighty cramped in one of them cells for sure. A sentence of 10 years in a solitary 2 foot by 2 foot cell on a diet of mushrooms and water will straighten you out and get your mind right. And if THAT don't straighten you out, well you can just spend a night in the box. *ptue - spitting 'backy with deadly accuracy at pesky mosquito.*
: : : Lemme see your license.
: : : Gnome Air Traffic Control
: : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
: : Now ya see...what we got HERE is...failYURE to COMMUNICATE! In other words...are YOU talkin' ta ME?
: : I kin see the grass waving wildly about down there...an' I hear a bunch o' squeaky little insultin' and irritatin' words driftin' up my way...but surely they can't be comin' from that puny little creature in the pointy red hat who just climbed up on a toadstool, with a bull(frog)horn in his hands.
: : Go ahead, Little Man...make...my...DAY!!
: :
: : :
: OKAY BOYS! She's in non-compliance and refuses to land as directed! Load up the goose Wash-ta into the anti-aircarpet guns! Prepare to fire! Get your stinker missles ready.....
: You! Private! Put your pointy helmet on! Dang.....how many times I got to tell you about that?
: Fay-yure to comyoonicate? I'll give her fay-yure to comyoonicate! She how she likes THIS! FIRE!!! "But sir, how do you know she is a king?" "Why it's bloody ovbious. Because she is the only one not covered in goose Wash-ta.....but not for LONG!" hehe
: WE can only hope when she flames out from goose Wash-ta in her engines, she crashes into a shrubbery and not a school yard.
: Gnome Dome Air Traffic Controller
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DANG!! That dagnab little man in the pointy hat's lobbin' WASH-TA at me! INCOOOOOOOOOMIIIIIIIIIIING!!! *ducks, and steers sharply to the left*
Whew! That was a close one. YIKES...there's WASH-TA to the left of me...WASH-TA to the right of me...and dead ahead...OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! A SHRUBBERREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! *carpet begins a long spiral downward* AAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!! Pull up, Sassy, Pullllllll uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!!!!!!
*WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!!*
Zounds!! That was a close one! *wipes sweat from furrowed brow with shaky hand* Mebbee I'd better let the Gnomes HAVE this round. Sometimes discretion IS the better part of valor, doncha know! *turns carpet towards home, and revs up*
*zzzzzzzzzoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooommmm!!!*
*small voices heard from under a toadstool*
"Is she gone?"
"Yep, she's gone, all right. But mebbee she'll be back...."
"Who WAS that Masked Wench?"
"Son, that was the LONE SOOTHSAYER!"
*way off in the distance*
"Hiyo, Ol' Purple....awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!"