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 Losing a Pet

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T O P I C    R E V I E W
caitlin Posted - January 04 2007 : 12:01:29 AM
Just need to vent sadness at the moment, I guess..

We had to put my husband's dog of over 15-yrs to sleep tonight. That dog was amazing at her persistance. When I was pregnant with all my kids, she irritated the heck out of me with her shedding (hormones *sigh*)and always got under foot when it came to food. Didn't matter what though, she always looked after everyone and was protective, especially with the kids - Bless her. She survived a coyote pack (6) attack only a couple of months ago and kept bouncing around like a new puppy afterwards. Last couple of days though, we knew her quality of life was not there anymore. ... I grew up in an area where my dogs often got hit by cars. Not saying that's a good thing, but I wonder if it's any easier to deal with when something that sudden happens instead?

Anyway, thanks for listening. All caught me off guard since we were hoping that Mother Nature would take her course and didn't. God love her, Duchess will be missed...fur shedding and all...
19   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
Obediah Posted - January 25 2007 : 12:48:32 AM
Caitlin, "I feel your pain," as someone once said. Over the years, I've lost uncounted cats & dogs, & it never hurts any less. And it doesn't matter how long you've had them (or they had you). We've hurt as much losing a cat of 16 years as losing a cat of 32 days...
caitlin Posted - January 24 2007 : 10:57:20 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Light of the Moon

I'm sorry to hear it, Caitlin. You definately have everyone's sympathy. Growing up on a farm you see a lot of that but it hurst just as bad every time. I still have a picture next to my bed of my favorite kitty, Miss. Prissy. That cat was cool! She figured out how to open closed doors and turn the lights on and off (which was terrible at 3a.m. when she finally decided she wanted to eat). But I spoiled her rotten. Rhinestone collars, pink canopy bed with Princess written with fake crystals. You name it she had it. She developed intestinal cancer and we did all we could for her but I put her to sleep after a year. Still cry when I remember her. I gotta' stop now.
But you have my heartfelt sympathy. We all feel ya'.



Thank you!
Light of the Moon Posted - January 24 2007 : 10:34:22 PM
I'm sorry to hear it, Caitlin. You definately have everyone's sympathy. Growing up on a farm you see a lot of that but it hurst just as bad every time. I still have a picture next to my bed of my favorite kitty, Miss. Prissy. That cat was cool! She figured out how to open closed doors and turn the lights on and off (which was terrible at 3a.m. when she finally decided she wanted to eat). But I spoiled her rotten. Rhinestone collars, pink canopy bed with Princess written with fake crystals. You name it she had it. She developed intestinal cancer and we did all we could for her but I put her to sleep after a year. Still cry when I remember her. I gotta' stop now.
But you have my heartfelt sympathy. We all feel ya'.
Wilderness Woman Posted - January 10 2007 : 5:22:59 PM
Thanks, Stephie.
Stephanie Posted - January 10 2007 : 09:51:26 AM
WW,
No nooo you didn't cause more pain. I'm glad you brought it up because I hope people will see different sides of it. I wish I had talked to more people about it beforehand because the vet's warning caught us off guard. With our discussion, people might be more prepared if they are ever faced with this. No need for you to apologize at all.
Wilderness Woman Posted - January 10 2007 : 08:09:54 AM
But Fitz, there's always the horrible chance that one bullet won't hit its mark just right. And that would be just awful.

Stephie, please don't feel guilty! This is a choice that no one can make for you. You must know your own feelings and reactions, and this option may not be for everyone.

Of course Lady has forgiven you, because that's the way dogs are. And I hope that you will forgive me for causing you more pain. That was never my intention.
Theresa Posted - January 10 2007 : 07:49:24 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Gadget Girl

Hey Theresa - was Bailey the Mom of the pups you had custody of several years back? Didn't you keep one of them? I remember some awfully cute pics of those puppies!

GG


Hey Girlfriend! No, Bailey was not the mother to those eleven babies we had. My daughter's dog has that honor and, yes, we kept one of them, who btw, has seven pups of his own. We love our Scout! He's four years old now and is still nothing but a big ol' puppy.
Fitzhugh Williams Posted - January 09 2007 : 10:57:07 PM
Sometimes I think that one bullet would be kinder than a trip to the vet. Hard to say.
Stephanie Posted - January 09 2007 : 8:13:42 PM
WW,
I'm glad you shared your experience about that. Others encouraged my husband and I to stay with Lady when the time came, and we fully planned to. What changed our mind at the last minute was the vet telling us that sometimes, when the shot is administered, the animal might jerk and give an involuntary yelp. She assured us that it didn't mean there was pain, it was just involuntary muscle contractions, and that it doesn't happen all the time but just sometimes. We decided we couldn't bear that. If we knew it would have been peaceful we would have stayed, but that small chance... we just couldn't. We waited outside, then pulled around back to pick her up and brought her back home and buried her on the farm. The only good thing about not being in the room is that it was so quick, she was only without us for a matter of a minute or two....but I now regret not being brave enough to stay. :-( I hope she forgives me for it.
Gadget Girl Posted - January 09 2007 : 2:54:09 PM
I did the same thing with my cat of 13 years, Joyce. Very Very hard, but it is the way I will always do for a pet that has to be put to sleep. I was the first one he saw when his little eyes opened and the last person he saw when they were closed for the last time.
Wilderness Woman Posted - January 09 2007 : 12:34:12 PM
Yes, losing a pet is very difficult, and I give you my sympathy, too, Caitlin. I don't care what people who don't care for animals say, they just do become a part of your household and of your family. I've had to say goodbye to several through the years.

No one has addressed this, so I would like to. The last pet I had to have put to sleep, my cat Amigo, I did something I never thought I could do: I held him in my arms while he left this world. Was it easy? Absolutely not. Was it comforting? Yes, it was. It was very comforting, because I saw for myself how easy and pain free it was for him. And it comforted me to know that he died while being held by someone who loved him very much, rather than a vet's office assistant who never knew him for the wonderful, funny, loving friend that he was.

My vet was very kind. She gave him a tranquilizing shot first, even though he was not struggling at all. He was too sick, and yes, he was ready. Then she administered the lethal injection. He never moved. He just relaxed into my arms... and was gone. Both Gary and I stood there with him, while the vet left us alone, and sobbed like children.

I will never, ever go back to the old way I used to do this. I will never, ever just drop an animal off and walk away. For me, it is too cold, too uncaring, and there is no closure. I now highly encourage others to do the same. In fact, I recently encouraged a friend to be with her elderly cat, which she did. She was very glad she did.
Gadget Girl Posted - January 09 2007 : 10:18:15 AM
Hey Theresa - was Bailey the Mom of the pups you had custody of several years back? Didn't you keep one of them? I remember some awfully cute pics of those puppies!

GG
Theresa Posted - January 09 2007 : 07:30:48 AM
So sorry to hear about Duchess, Caitlin. My daughter-in-law had to have her 15-year-old Golden Retriever, Bailey, put down right before Christmas. She wears a little necklace with her picture on it and I suppose she will do that until she's ready to let go. Bailey was precious. However, the Wednesday following this sad event on Saturday, they got a new puppy, same breed...Jonah! A little ball of fur, fiest, and fun!

Diana, sorry to hear Delta isn't doing well. I know how you love her.
caitlin Posted - January 05 2007 : 11:39:44 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Gadget Girl

I am going through the exact same dilemma now, Caitlin! My Delta, a German Shepherd, is 14 years old. I keep thinking it is time to let her go - that she is in pain, and then she rallies back and is playful and smiling (yep, she DOES smile!) eating very well and I just can't do it. She has hip dysplasia and arthritis and is on pain meds and just started having seizures before Christmas (she has only had 2) and now is on phenobarbitol and walks like a drunken sailor right after she takes that. I thought I could do this between Christmas and New Year's and now my daughter is having the hard time letting go - it is a day to day thing now. I think I am waiting for her to look me in the eye and say - "I'm ready now". I had a 13 yo cat that did just that - and I never questioned my decision. I don't think this will be that easy!

My thoughts and heart go out to you and Jeff and the kids for losing a beloved member of the family!



Thanks, GG!
I'm so sorry that you're going through the same dilemma. It is so hard because you keep wanting them to give you that sign - wanting something simply as "hitting us over the head". I can see what Stephanie's husband was saying, because I tell you that Vets for over 5 years kept wanting us to put her down for various reasons and we kept saying that we'd let nature take her course and took it day by day. I'll be darned if she didn't live a full and enriched life for several years after... I guess that was why we kept hoping this time. Never question your decision though, it usually is for the best.

Our thoughts are with you and your family as well!
hugs,
caitlin & the gang
Gadget Girl Posted - January 05 2007 : 4:45:20 PM
I am going through the exact same dilemma now, Caitlin! My Delta, a German Shepherd, is 14 years old. I keep thinking it is time to let her go - that she is in pain, and then she rallies back and is playful and smiling (yep, she DOES smile!) eating very well and I just can't do it. She has hip dysplasia and arthritis and is on pain meds and just started having seizures before Christmas (she has only had 2) and now is on phenobarbitol and walks like a drunken sailor right after she takes that. I thought I could do this between Christmas and New Year's and now my daughter is having the hard time letting go - it is a day to day thing now. I think I am waiting for her to look me in the eye and say - "I'm ready now". I had a 13 yo cat that did just that - and I never questioned my decision. I don't think this will be that easy!

My thoughts and heart go out to you and Jeff and the kids for losing a beloved member of the family!
caitlin Posted - January 04 2007 : 11:04:22 PM
Thank you, everyone, for your stories! My condolences to you and all pet owners that have had to go through this as well. We buried Duchess today with our kids and we all talked about how important it was to remember that she wasn't in pain now and all of the good times we all had together... it was nice. Very quiet house though...

Thanks again for listening...
Life is so precious....
Caitlin
Stephanie Posted - January 04 2007 : 09:32:06 AM
Caitlin, I'm so sorry to hear about Duchess. We just went through this in September with my husband's 18-year-old border collie, Lady. We realized over the past year or so that her quality of life was going downhill, then it got suddenly worse. After we buried her, my husband asked, do you think she'll forgive us? I said, for what, for putting her to sleep? He said, no, for not doing it sooner. You, as the pet owner, make the ultimate sacrifice when you do this, and you have to keep reminding yourself that you did Duchess a favor in the long run.
In the meantime, here is a link to Rainbow Bridge, which someone sent me back in September. Warning, you will cry, but it might make you feel better:
http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm

Stephanie


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Kaylynn44 Posted - January 04 2007 : 08:03:23 AM
Caitlin,
I am so sorry to hear about Duchess. It isn't easy to lose a pet, especially when you have had her around for so many years. A little over three years ago, my little Dolly died. We had her for 13 years and I didn't think that I would ever get over the pain of losing her. Every time that I thought about her, I would cry, which was every day. Now I can think about her and smile because of all of the joy that she brought to our lives. I know that one day you will be able to remember Duchess without pain and sadness.

Love,
Kay
RedFraggle Posted - January 04 2007 : 02:41:28 AM
Dear Caitlin: I'm so sorry to hear about Duchess. It's always very sad when Mother Nature has to be helped along in the case of family pets. My parents recently had to have their ten-year-old beagle put to sleep. When my Mom called me to give me the news I cried for a good while.

So sorry again.

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