Posted by Doc M on March 15, 2000 at 14:26:32:
In Reply to: Re: To All Who Live Here - World class bout between Doc and MMMMarcia posted by Gnome Dome on March 15, 2000 at 14:09:39:
: : : : Doc M FOOLISHLY writes (and probably equally foolishly BELIEVES):
: : : : (And keep yer distance from my magnificently
: : : : : muscled, black-haired, steely-eyed Hawkie-poo. I have
: : : : : enough trouble with MMMMarcia! I ain't done with him yet!!)
: : : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
: : : : YOUR Hawkie-poo?? YOURS??? Oh, ha, ha and HA! It's to laugh, O' Demented One! And you think you've had trouble with me in the past?? You ain't seen NUTHIN' yet, Docster! Myrrh's treasure trove of new pictures last week, coupled with the balmy spring weather hereabouts, has reawakened my innermost, spiritual self, and done a pretty good turn for my outermost nature, as well! I'm in the mood for a knock-down, drag-out, doncha know! Keep your hands off'n mah man, or you'll find yerself in the middle of one!!!!
: : : : So there.
: : : : Your Rival in All Things Hawkful!
: : : : MMMM
: : : 'Scuse me, 'scuse me...Doc M has to gently and carefully
: : : move Miss Emma to one side here -- she's too tender to
: : : be bruised up yet. You just sit there, darlin', and be
: : : ladylike. Maybe Doc M will throw you a little scrap of
: : : The True Loincloth to use as a security blankie.
: : : NOW! *rubbing hands together* Doc M leaps off her
: : : trusty road grader and hastily pulls on her lacy bloomers
: : : and high-heeled sneakers... "C'MON!! C'MON! Show me
: : : whatcha got!!" She springs lightly back and forth on
: : : the balls of her feet, rubbing her nose on her hand-tooled
: : : gnome-leather boxing gloves..."Yah got NUTHIN'! Yah got
: : : NUTHIN!! C'mon in da ring, already!" *snort! snort!*
: : : Doc M
: : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
: : Now calm down Docy Poo. It is true mon ami that anyone who befreinds that..that Hawk Nose or Hawk Eye or what ever he goes by, should be delt with and delt with swiftly. I won`t stand in your way but I WILL cover your backside. I hear this MMMMarcia does have a few friends and some of them are in law enforcment. Or was that lawn restorment. Oh well, anyway, you can keep the loincloth scraps as I have no need for them. I`ll just be over here polishing my trade goods.
: : French Trader
: Yeah, well French Trader, if'n you are gonna cover THAT backside,
: you better get about 40 or 50 buddies to help you. THAT backside covers a LOTTA width.....takes a heap o' coverin'!!!! heee heeeeeeee!!!!
: Now, let me make sure I got everything I needs to deliver to sweet MMMMMarcia for this here little contest with Doc...hmmmm...yeah, horseshoe (for inside of glove), nice heavy shot filled sap (for getting Doc's attention), some salt and sulfur (for casting in Doc's evil eyes at opportune moments),
: baseball bat (no explanation needed), boxing trunks with WIDE waistband and deep pockets for holding all these accesories outta sight of the Ref, Boxing booties a'la Live or Let Die with dagger in toe......hmmm that should cover it!!! Wouldn't wanna give MMMMarcia unfair advantage ya know!
: Gnome Dome
Bring it ON! I will defeat any vile acts of treachery
with clear eyes and a pure heart! All the angels of
heaven are behind me! And I've got to stop now, because
I'm making MYSELF sick with this drool! All I've got
to say is, the referee for this here bout will be none
other than my sister-under-the-scaly-skin, my hors-de
combat! Ladies and Germs and nasty wee creatures of
the forest, I present The Great and Most Terrible
Mother of All Mohicanland ... Ms. E-LAYNE!!!!
Doc M