Re: Message to GnomeDome via Carrier Parrot

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: My dear Parrot,

: And have you never heard of elf shot?  Those tiny little stone arrowheads that are found on the ground?  That when fired by Gnomes, fairyfolk and other magical creatures will cause the target to be elfstruck and helpless?  And fairies, the last I talked with them, fly also my dear succulent soon-to-be-roasted
: soon-to-be-featherless chicken of the parrot persuasion.

: Here, let me rub some salve on your poor widdle self....a specially soothing salve of butter, sage and thyme.  Doesnt it smell just lovely?  Doesnt it make you just want to lie down and relax?  *sliding enameled oval bed toward Basil*

: Gnome

: : My Dear Gnomeling,

: : I...ah...squ'ark...don't wanna burst your bubble, but...ummm...er...have you not noticed that...how shall I put this...I, being a psitticine of the avian persuasion, namely a large, green & red, well-feathered MEXICAN RED-HEADED AMAZON PARROT, can FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???  While YOU, being a measly, sawed-off, stubby-fingered, bandy-legged, pint-sized pipsqueak of a GNOMELET can barely even WALK???  Do you think I'll just sit still like the half-witted DODO bird you apparently take me for, whilst you hobble your little bitty self up and cram an apple in my beak, pluck my body BUCK NEKKID, and toss me in a stew pot???  I THINK NOT, TWERP!!

: : Yours Truly and so on and so on,
: : Basil (as in the owner of Fawlty Towers, not the gourmet herb)


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