Report to Courier Editors on JFC Fast Foods

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: Dear Courier Editors,

: Before heading back to York after the recent emotionally exhausting assignment on The Siege, I decided to check out the new Dutch eating establishment mentionned in your Sunday edition.  I want you to know, I was tremendously impressed with these folks.  I ordered their Quick-Pick-Me-Up Roast Venison Dinner, and settled down for a quiet mug of spruce while I waited.  Although there was, for a few minutes, an unexplained flurry of stamping feet and banging doors back in the kitchen area, in less than fifteen minutes I was served an excellent venison steak with mashed potatoes, gravy, several tender and beautifully prepared vegetables and a fine cherry cobbler for dessert.  I was particularly amazed to find it all served on the finest Delft china.  I didn't realize this was such a high class place.  However, upon looking around at the tables of the other diners, I saw everything from English bone china to handcarved wooden trenchers and that wonderful unbreakable Micmac dinnerware.  All patrons seemed to be satisfied with the food and the service, however.

: Upon getting ready to leave, I decided to order a Take-Out, since I expected to be long on the trail and not sure of the game between here and York.  I ordered the Quick-Fix Chicken, and in less time than it takes to fall off my horse, I was handed a leathern pouch containing my order, and I started off up the trail.  Now we get into the strange part.  About sundown, I decided to stop and stoke up the ol' furnace, and upon opening my sack, what should I find but a rubber chicken and two gravy soaked tennis balls!  Not having time to return, I made do, the chicken being reasonably edible when combined with a liberal tot of rum, howsever.  What great jokers these Dutch dudes are!

: She-Who-Tracks-La Longue Carabine

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