Re: To The Great & Terrible Lainey, Our Mohican Magistrate

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Subject : 

Comments:
: : : Doctor Mary must insist that TGAT Lainey issue an immediate
: : : arrest warrent for the wretched wench MMMMarcia, who has had
: : : the forehead-smacking GALL to practice medicine in Doctor Mary's
: : : territory without a license!!! The aforementioned territory 
: : : being 1 (one) party of the first part butt belonging to
: : : 1 (one) Nathaniel Poe, AKA Natty BUMppo, AKA Hawkeye, AKA
: : : Le Longue Carabine, AKA Doctor Mary's Chief HugHoney and
: : : USDA Prime Rump Roast!!! 

: : : Doctor Mary found the poor man whimpering and shivering on
: : : her doorstep this morning, with an acute case of Infectus
: : : Buttitus Ouchus...the worst case she has seen in her many
: : : many years of practice!! Upon further examination, Doctor
: : : Mary was able to determine the problem was caused by the
: : : inept application of cheap generic substitutes for the
: : : usual fine pharmacologia employed by Doctor Mary...such
: : : as Gnome Margarine rather than finely wrought Gnome Butter,
: : : and rotgut Southern Comfort rather than Doctor Mary's
: : : specially brewed head-bangin', eyeball poppin', hell
: : : no I'm not married honey Corn Squeezin's!! 

: : : This Infamy must not be allowed to continue a moment longer!!
: : : I throw myself on the implacable mercy of Lainey the Great
: : : and Terrible! Hear my pleas, O Most Wise!! Clap the Malpracticing
: : : Malfeasant Mohicanite Marcia in the bowels of the dankest
: : : dungeon of Mohicanland before she strikes again!!! 

: : : Have a nice day!

: : : Doctor M

: : This IS disgusting!
: : She was there ... she KNEW what it was. Of course! Untouchable Save DoctorM's Approval rump roast...
: : Well, your pleas for justice have truly moved my heart.

: : Which punishment do you prefer? Rack & Quarter (my personal favorite), Torn to itty bitty pieces by wild dogs, or life imprisonment juuuust out of reach of said poster boy's boy poster? You may choose from one of the above.

: : While I'm rolling out penitents' penance, Richfed ought to be burned at the stake, don't you think? Imagine giving stage to sniveling, snotty nosed, scandalous scribblings ... spoiled brat!

: : Have a nice day, Doc.

: : TGAT L

: : PS Have any more of that 'hell
: : no I'm not married honey Corn Squeezin'????

: Thank you SEW much, Great And Terrible She. A case of 
: Doctor Mary's Aged For Three Days Hell No, etc. etc.
: is even as we speak being delivered to your abode
: by two of her choicest pectorially perfect Huronic
: specimens. I dew hope you can...er...put them up
: overnight. *wink! wink!* Can Doctor Mary pick Door
: Number One...Rack and Quartered, perhaps while the
: perfidious wretch is also forced to watch Doctor
: Mary's Hawkeye Honeymoon videos? 

: Kiss! Kiss!

: Doc M


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