Re: New Folks in Mohicanland

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Posted by Gnome Dome on March 08, 2000 at 10:19:23:

In Reply to: Re: New Folks in Mohicanland posted by Doc M on March 08, 2000 at 08:40:47:

: : : : My dear Miss Paddletale:

: : : : Thank you so much for the effusive welcome to Mohicanland! We shall try our best to be outstanding citizens...I must warn you though...never, but never, refer to the kilt or the brecan faile as a "skirt" within the hearing of the Scot who is wearing it. He shall immediately consider his manhood challenged and take drastic steps to correct your impression...and I hesitate to add that duck is one of The MacLeod's favorite foods! Consider also that the man, at any given time, carries at least 3 sharply honed and lovingly cared-for blades about his person...

: : : : Sincerely,

: : : : Lady Ann

: : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

: : : *QUACKQUACKQUACK!* *SQUACK!!*

: : : Ducks as FOOD?? QUACKQUACK! SQUACKLE! Blades?? Sharply-honed? QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK!!!!!!! OH! OH! Oh, MY!! *running in circles faster and faster* ACK!! QUACK!! Run for your lives, fellow ducks!! Run far, run FAAAAAAAAST!!! QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK....pant, pant, pant, pantpantpant...GASP! *THUD!!!!*

: : : *dead silence...a very blue in the beak Miss Paddletale lies flat out on her feathered backside in the middle of the Village Green*

: : Oh.......it isn't so funny when somebody ELSE decides maybe a DIFFERENT inhabitant of Mohicanland might make a nice meal, is it?

: : Or, or how about with Easter coming up we catch a few ducks for ourselves and stuff them for our gaily painted baskets? The kids would LOVE those fluffy stuffed ducks in amongst their colored eggs and fuuuuddddgggee bunnies.

: : But moving on to the topic of discussion......so Lady Ann, I always loved those plaid wraparound skirts held together with a pin. Along with the knee length socks. Very cute. Are you saying that a Scot would actually be offended if I admired his?
: : He would actually NOT be flattered if I told him "Hey, NICE SKIRT. Which girls prep school do you attend?"

: : *chuckle snort guffaw*

: : BillyGnome

: Oh Billy -- don't ask a brawny Scotsman that question until
: I can fetch a video camera, ok? I'm sure he would not be
: at all offended -- in fact, he'd probably want to play
: one of those fun highland games with you...perhaps the
: one where they fling those things that look like telephone
: poles at a target. Don't forget to...dare I say it?...
: *duck* !!!

: Doc M

Doc M,

I always kinda figured that telephone pole thing was some sort of psychological phallic compensatory thing with the Scots, ya know?
Like, well you get the picture!! The only TRUE Celts are the IRISH!!!!!!

The Scots are the toadies of the English!

*hey they may be fightin' words, but I betcha those big, brawny Scots (the ones with the happy sheep herds) aren't gonna be able to run down my hollow tree stump after me!!!*

Gnome Dome

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