Posted by Gnome on October 07, 1999 at 14:33:26:
In Reply to: The SKY is Falling, the SKY is falling! posted by Miss Paddletale on October 07, 1999 at 13:49:23:
Well, I told myself I would NOT associate with these heathens anymore as they didnt even leave a little snack on the doorstep from that feast they had. Such affrontery. Everybody knows to leave a little snack on the doorstep for the kindly, industrious gnomes.
But......I can't see somebody helpless and not wanna help. And
that duck seems to be having a fowl time of it trying to revive the old bag. Never seen anything so pitiful and frantic as that stupid duck! So worked up it is, that it's molting. Feathers everywhere.
Well.....darnit....then here I go. *splash. gurgle. frantic splashing. gurgle gurgle gurgle* HEY! I CAN'T SWIM! I'm a wood gnome not a water nymph! How could I forget that???????? HELP HELP *gurgle splash gurgle*
*going under and thinking to himself....I have deja vu flashes here of being in this fix afore. Where is that darn French woman when you need her?*
GURGLE
Gnome
: *QUACK-QUACK-QUACK! Squark!! Squawk-squawk! ACKACKACK!!!*
: Ohmigosh, omigolly! I do NOT understand what is happening here! *Squark!!* Help, help, help! The Old Crone's wattle hut is floating awaaaaaaaaaay!! Help! *Quack!! Quack!!* And Old Crone is lying prostrate on the floor therein! She fell victim to a BLUNT remark! *ACK!!* Call the paramedics!! Call Dr. Well Bee! Call the COAST GUARD!! *quackquackquackquack!* We MUST rescue her at once! Hurry! Hurryhurryhurry! No time to lose!! *squark! squack!!* Oh, if only someone could swim out to the hut and tow it ashore, like those three handsome heroes did a few weeks ago! *ACK! SQUACK!!* Wait a minute...I'm a DUCK!! *I* can swim!! *kersplash! paddlepaddlepaddlepaddle!!*
: Ohdear, ohdear...*big hop on board!* *pantpant!*
: Old Crone, Old Crone...wake up! WAKE UP! Well...guess it's time for some beak-to-mouth resuscitation! *puff...one and two and three and...puff...one and two and three and...puffffffffff!* Old Crone, can ye hear me??? It's Miss Paddletale...wake up, I say! You're made of tougher stuff than this! Get up and help me pole your wattle hut back to shore. I've already splashed out the flames. Come on now, take a deep breath! *slap! slapslapslapslap!* OK...guess I have to walk her around the deck till she comes outta it...lemme get my wing around her, here. *pace, pace, walkwalkwalk, pace*
: that's it, Old Crone, round and round we go. *ACK!!* Turn AWAY from the light, turn AWAY from the light!! Come on back now, where you're needed!
: *quackquackquack!* Can anyone on shore swim out here and give me a hand? I have matters under wing for the time being, but things aren't over yet....HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP! *squawksquawksquawk!!!*
: Frantically Yours, as usual,
: Miss Paddletale
: *squawk!*