Posted by Gnome on September 24, 1999 at 11:15:19:
In Reply to: Grousings & Mutterings from the INDOOR Hickory Perch posted by Basil on September 23, 1999 at 22:37:43:
Hey Bird! What is it with you? What is this "grousings" and mutterings stuff? Can't you make up your mind about what kinda bird you are? Be you parrot, grouse, green chicken or as I prefer to think of you - Gnome turkey?
Your feathers appear to be ruffled a bit. Gee, I am sorry for that. Here, let me help groom you a bit and soothe those ruffled feathers....and perhaps give you a pin-feather trim as they seem a bit longish (hehe).
If a Gnome had a mind to, by the way, no cage would provide you any real protection ya know. It is an illusion of safety. In fact, might be a dang good idea! That-a-way there is no danger from that enormously wicked beak of yours while we lower cage and all into the boiling cauldron. Oh my how kind of your Person to provide a lovely device with which to easily par-boil you and lift you from the roiling waters afterward.
I did like your song though Basil *dancing a happy Gnome dance with his pot in hand - humming along with tune*
I seem to remember that song dimly from the days when gnomes wore bell bottomed lederhosen.
Anticipatory Gnome
: *flapflap, fluffle, flutter*
: {Geez, Lew-squ'arking-weeze! What's the deal in this here Mohicanland, anydernway? You'd think in a quiet little burg like this, a parrot would be just fine, wouldn't ya? Well, you'd be WRONG, if you were to think such a thing!! I'm beset on every side by hungry dadblamed gnomes and revenge seeking wimmen like Miss Gaylee! Don't know what I ever did to those two to deserve the plotting and scheming they've been up to! Well, I DID bite Ol' Tubby Percival a pretty good one, but he was askin' for it, anyway. He started this whole "green chicken" business, and stuck his fat little finger right at my head. Yeah, I know I lured him into that part, a bit...but still! No permanent damage was done. It ain't like I made soup outta HIM, or anything! I guess I'd better play it real...CAGEY...around here, if ya get my drift! Hmmmmm...good idea. I'll get my new Person to fashion me a nice, strong cage with a good stout LOCK on it...and with bars spaced too tight for even the scrawniest of gnomes to get through. Yeah, that's what I'll do, and then let that ol' GnomeDome starve for all I care!!}
: "Chirp! Hello, Mommy. Hello, Mommy. Basil wants a cage. Chirp. Basil needs a cage!"
: {This Polly Anna's a real soft touch, all right. Bet she'll have me a nice, secure home fixed up before the morning! She loves her little precious Basil!}
: "Basil loves Mommy! Basil loves Mommy! Chirpy-chirple!"
: {Doesn't hurt to work on her a bit, either. hehe}
: "Sweetliddle chirples. Mommy fix Basil's cage? Basil's such a good bird. Good, good Basil. Basil wanna cage, Basil wanna cage!"
: {"Ah, there she goes into the root cellar, mumbling something about a turkey pen. I'll be snug as a bird in a rug before this night is over!}
: *Flutter, flap, rustle, fluff, fluff*
: "Somethin's happening here,
: What it is ain't exactly clear,
: There's a gnome with a pot over there,
: Tellin' me I got to beware...
: Think it's time to watch, hey, what's that sound?
: Polly Anna, look who's sneakin' round!"