Posted by Seamus on March 04, 2001 at 16:38:04:
In Reply to: Re: Cultural Differences..... posted by Kate on March 04, 2001 at 15:41:12:
: : Okay, I would like to apologise in advance...it will save me a WHOLE lotta time later. If you want someone to blame, blame the Dutch Trader...she made me do it! And if you don't know what I am talking about......read on.....
: :
: : CULTURAL DIFFERENCES:
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH
: : You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.
: : You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.
: : You're exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.
: : You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen is your capital.
: : You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it's a national tradition.
: : You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country.
: : You can legally kill yourself - You can legally be killed.
: : You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still you've never seen your neighbours.
: : If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.
: : Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH:
: : When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay
: : Experience the joy of winning the World Cup for the first time
: : You get to eat insect food like snails, and frog's legs
: : If there's a war you can surrender really early
: : You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on Channel 4.
: : You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries (Well who hasn't eh?)
: : You can be ugly and still become a famous film star
: : Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride
: : You don't have to bother with toilets, just s*** in the street
: : People think you're a great lover even when you're not
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN :
: : You can have a woman president without electing her
: : You can spell colour wrong and get away with it
: : You can call Budweiser beer
: : You can be a crook and still be president
: : If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything
: : If you can breathe you can get a gun
: : You get to join wars late
: : You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
: : You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
: : You can think you're the greatest nation on earth
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING NORWEGIAN:
: : You get to pay the highest taxes in the world
: : You can kill baby seals and eat Rudolf the Reindeer
: : You live in total freezing darkness half the year and get 24 hour ozone-hole radiation the other half
: : You can get capital punishment for smoking dope
: : You can go skiing in your knickers
: : You get to hate the Swedes and beat the Brazilians in football
: : You have to be a woman to get anywhere
: : You don't need to worry about land prices rocketing - it's fairly spacious
: : When abroad you can impress people you meet with stories about killing polar bears and sex acts with penguins - and they believe you
: : You can actually get bored with blondes
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH :
: : Two World Wars and One World Cup-doo-dah, doo-dah
: : Proper beer
: : You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket
: : You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events
: : Union jack underpants
: : Water shortages guaranteed every single summer
: : You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
: : Bathing once a week - whether you need to or not
: : Ditto changing underwear
: : Beats being Welsh.
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SCOTTISH :
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: : You ain't English!
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN :
: : In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes
: : Unembarrassed to wear fur.
: : No need to worry about tax returns
: : Glorious military history prior to 400 b.c.
: : Can wear sunglasses inside
: : Political stability?
: : Flexible working hours
: : Live near the Pope
: : Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair
: : Country run by Sicilian murderers
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH :
: : Glorious history of killing South American tribes
: : The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees
: : You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits, etc.
: : The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans
: : Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing
: : Honesty
: : Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls
: : You get to eat bulls' testicles
: : Gibraltar
: : Supported Argentina in Falklands War.
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING INDIAN :
: : Chicken Madras
: : Lamb Passanda
: : Onion Bhaji
: : Bombay Potato
: : Chicken Tikka Masala
: : Rogan Josh
: : Popadoms
: : Chicken Dopiaza
: : Meat Boona
: : Kingfisher lager
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH:
: : You've got to be joking?
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH :
: : Guinness
: : 18 children because you can't use contraceptives
: : You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road
: : Pubs never close
: : Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in second Vatican Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a condom on.
: : No one can ever remember the night before
: : Kill people you don't agree with
: : Stew
: : More Guinness
: : Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN :
: : It beats being an American.
: : Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: : You can play ice hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
: : Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: : Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
: : A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
: : Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: : Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins
: : Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
: : Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground
: :
: : TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN:
: : Know your great grandfather was a murdering bar steward that no civilised nation on earth wanted.
: : Fosters Lager
: : Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you.
: : Cricket captain not afraid to cry live on TV.
: : Tact and sensitivity. NOT!
: : Bondi Beach.
: : Other beaches.
: : Liberated attitude to homosexuals
: : Drinking cold lager on the beach
: : Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach.
: :
: : TOP TEN REASONS TO BE A GERMAN:
: : You do not WANT to go to the Oktoberfest, you know it is sh*t
: : Cheap fantastic beer
: : Behave like you want, everybody hates you anyway
: : Expensive fantastic cars
: : Unlimited Autobahn
: : Who else lost two world wars??
: : Who else in europe won three world cups :-) :-) :-) ??
: : You can buy all neighbour countries...
: : But you are not stupid, you rent them in the summer
: : See number 2+4+5 = BIG FUN
: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
: Oh Adele, this was ABSOLUTELY PRICELESS!!! And the BEST part is - it's all true!! :o)
: (Now - where shall I move to... *decisions, decisions*
: Kate.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Adele!!
You have just moved up lotsa notches on my "Favorites" list!! I love an equal opportunity offender...! (You forgot Newfoundland and Poland...naw...ya'd hafta explain each one to them....and then they still wouldn't get it.)
Pax AYE!!
Seamus