Posted by Kate on March 04, 2001 at 15:41:12:
In Reply to: Cultural Differences..... posted by Adele on March 04, 2001 at 13:59:20:
: Okay, I would like to apologise in advance...it will save me a WHOLE lotta time later. If you want someone to blame, blame the Dutch Trader...she made me do it! And if you don't know what I am talking about......read on.....
:
: CULTURAL DIFFERENCES:
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH
: You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.
: You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.
: You're exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.
: You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen is your capital.
: You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it's a national tradition.
: You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country.
: You can legally kill yourself - You can legally be killed.
: You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still you've never seen your neighbours.
: If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.
: Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH:
: When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay
: Experience the joy of winning the World Cup for the first time
: You get to eat insect food like snails, and frog's legs
: If there's a war you can surrender really early
: You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on Channel 4.
: You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries (Well who hasn't eh?)
: You can be ugly and still become a famous film star
: Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride
: You don't have to bother with toilets, just s*** in the street
: People think you're a great lover even when you're not
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN :
: You can have a woman president without electing her
: You can spell colour wrong and get away with it
: You can call Budweiser beer
: You can be a crook and still be president
: If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything
: If you can breathe you can get a gun
: You get to join wars late
: You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
: You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
: You can think you're the greatest nation on earth
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING NORWEGIAN:
: You get to pay the highest taxes in the world
: You can kill baby seals and eat Rudolf the Reindeer
: You live in total freezing darkness half the year and get 24 hour ozone-hole radiation the other half
: You can get capital punishment for smoking dope
: You can go skiing in your knickers
: You get to hate the Swedes and beat the Brazilians in football
: You have to be a woman to get anywhere
: You don't need to worry about land prices rocketing - it's fairly spacious
: When abroad you can impress people you meet with stories about killing polar bears and sex acts with penguins - and they believe you
: You can actually get bored with blondes
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH :
: Two World Wars and One World Cup-doo-dah, doo-dah
: Proper beer
: You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket
: You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events
: Union jack underpants
: Water shortages guaranteed every single summer
: You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
: Bathing once a week - whether you need to or not
: Ditto changing underwear
: Beats being Welsh.
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SCOTTISH :
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
: You ain't English!
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN :
: In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes
: Unembarrassed to wear fur.
: No need to worry about tax returns
: Glorious military history prior to 400 b.c.
: Can wear sunglasses inside
: Political stability?
: Flexible working hours
: Live near the Pope
: Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair
: Country run by Sicilian murderers
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH :
: Glorious history of killing South American tribes
: The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees
: You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits, etc.
: The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans
: Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing
: Honesty
: Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls
: You get to eat bulls' testicles
: Gibraltar
: Supported Argentina in Falklands War.
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING INDIAN :
: Chicken Madras
: Lamb Passanda
: Onion Bhaji
: Bombay Potato
: Chicken Tikka Masala
: Rogan Josh
: Popadoms
: Chicken Dopiaza
: Meat Boona
: Kingfisher lager
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH:
: You've got to be joking?
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH :
: Guinness
: 18 children because you can't use contraceptives
: You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road
: Pubs never close
: Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in second Vatican Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a condom on.
: No one can ever remember the night before
: Kill people you don't agree with
: Stew
: More Guinness
: Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN :
: It beats being an American.
: Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: You can play ice hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
: Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
: A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
: Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
: Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins
: Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
: Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground
:
: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN:
: Know your great grandfather was a murdering bar steward that no civilised nation on earth wanted.
: Fosters Lager
: Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you.
: Cricket captain not afraid to cry live on TV.
: Tact and sensitivity. NOT!
: Bondi Beach.
: Other beaches.
: Liberated attitude to homosexuals
: Drinking cold lager on the beach
: Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach.
:
: TOP TEN REASONS TO BE A GERMAN:
: You do not WANT to go to the Oktoberfest, you know it is sh*t
: Cheap fantastic beer
: Behave like you want, everybody hates you anyway
: Expensive fantastic cars
: Unlimited Autobahn
: Who else lost two world wars??
: Who else in europe won three world cups :-) :-) :-) ??
: You can buy all neighbour countries...
: But you are not stupid, you rent them in the summer
: See number 2+4+5 = BIG FUN
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Oh Adele, this was ABSOLUTELY PRICELESS!!! And the BEST part is - it's all true!! :o)
(Now - where shall I move to... *decisions, decisions*
Kate.