Posted by Red-Haired Lass on September 03, 2000 at 19:38:13:
Well, ye can't be sayin' life is ever boring at yer fine colony's drinkin' establishment. Although it's the Sabbath, technically, and me Catholic background might cause me some serious blushin' to announce this (and yes, all of ye wise-crackin' local gents, the red-haired lass is still able to blush at a few things), I've got some new entertainment signed on beginnin' tonight what might entertain some of the ladies. Ye see, the Huron Delivery Boy was down fishin' the latest round of gnome vestments out of me cistern this mornin' when he comes upon this nice gentleman named Victor what says he's been sent here by one of the Delivery Boy's friends who usually winters in Can-Tuck-ee.Seems as there's a right splendid lookin' Huron man who's developed a form o'dance that, shall I best say it, is meant to provide multi-sensory entertainment to all the ladyfolk. This man's been estranged from his true love, who thought him dead and took another (or so the Delivery Boy phrases it),so he's travelin' about providin' what they be callin' a "LapDance" to all interested female customers. The payment? Why either a shillin' or a crock o'homemade marmalade (what is with folks an' marmalade these days?) He's startin' up in the billiards room in about an hour, so ladies...I'll be expectin'a long line...free corn squeezin's to the first 10 customers.
An might I add I've sampled the entertainment, as has Mrs. O'Reilly, and it comes highly recommended...
yers, Red