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richfed
Sachem
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 13 2002
Status: offline
Administrator |
 Posted - May 09 2004 : 09:51:48 AM
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This is a difficult post for me to make ... one I wonder if I even should be making. It's personal, without a doubt, so perhaps it has no place on a public bulletin board. I won't go into much in the way of detail, but as this is a public forum, and Lainey & I have long been two of the mainstays of the place, I guess there is some purpose - need, even - to fill you all in.
Many of you have wondered ... Where are they? ... Lainey & Rich, that is.
For one thing, Lainey's computer has tanked, so she has had no Internet access the past two weeks, or so. She has another one stored away. I suppose she's not in all that much of a hurry to re-connect.
The fact of the matter is, we two have separated. As of March 27. I have informed the moderators of the Mohican Board of that, as well as a few others of you in conversation, but, all-in-all, it's been a "well-kept secret".
To answer questions, it was, more or less, a mutual decision. Lainey still lives in Marion with the kids at our old house. I now live 50 miles west, just west of Asheville, in Candler, NC. My days of work now are over 12 hours, including my travel time, so my computer time has been severely curtailed. Not by my choosing ... just the way it is at the moment. I no longer live 5 minutes from the job, able to check in at lunchtime. By the time I get home now in the evening I am pretty well exhausted. I download my many virus-infected messages just to keep my server from bogging down, and that's about it. I've had no time for web site related chores - save the Gathering - at all in the past 6 weeks.
It's not been easy ... after 24 plus years and a passel of kids adjusting to a "new" life has been difficult. Trying to maintain focus at work, keep the Gathering on target, get my book published, etc., etc. among the swirling emotions - of all types - has been a daunting task.
Lainey is fine. I am, too. Relatively. I see the kids frequently at lunchtime.
So, there you have it. It's up to you all to keep this Board a varied & vibrant place - for the short haul, at least. I do what I can, but I have no emotion - or time - to deal with posts like that made by GP the other day - Richfed, what happened to efforts to get the First Theatrical version released?. Don't understand where he is coming from at all.
Gathering Notes: If you've missed any of this ... Mohicans Game Day Prizes can be reviewed at Mohicans Game Prizes at the Gathering. The Deadline for refunds has passed. The Deadline for sign-ups is nearly here - May 20. Updated list of Gatherers - though not all are paid up, so I wonder, is here: The List of 2004 Gathering Attendees!. I need to know - promptly - if you are intending to be at the Joanne Shenandoah Concert. Remaining tickets to be turned over to Spirits on the River very, very soon ... later today???!!!!. Speaking of that place, if you are dining there have you notified Ann Colby of your dinner selections?
SIGN-UP - VERY SOON - at: 2004 Gathering Sign-ups
See you in June!
And, a very happy Mothers Day to all you Mothers! Thank you, Mom!
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Rich
Mohican Press
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Scott Bubar
Colonial Militia
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 17 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 09 2004 : 11:07:50 AM
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Wow.
I can't say as I'm totally surprised since you did forewarn us that something was going on, but still.
You know, you and Elaine are the "Dad and Mom" of this forum, and irrational as it seems, I'm feeling a bit of the same sort of anxiety a kid feels in this sort of situation, as well as worrying that it's "something we did". (Such as adding to yours and Elaine's stress when you needed all your resources for real parenting.) Irrational, but there it is.
I'm glad you decided to share this, Rich. Otherwise, we'd all be sitting there, knowing something is going on, but it's taboo to mention. It would be like the elephant in the living room. On other forums, it might not be appropriate, but on this one it certainly is.
I'm not going to offer any words of comfort or advice, but I do hope you and Elaine will use the forum as a source of pleasure and meaning, or just as a diversion--as it has served so many of us--thanks to your efforts.
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~~Aim small, miss small. |
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Wilderness Woman
Watcher of the Wood
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
November 27 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 09 2004 : 11:52:22 AM
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Words very well said, Scott.
I would only like to add that you both, Rich and Elaine, have been in my thoughts a lot lately. I know exactly what it is like to go through what you are both going through. It is never easy.
Rich, I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that it is simply not the same here on the boards without you here as a strong and nearly constant presence. We can, and will, carry on... but we hope that you can be back in your role as commander-in-chief of this outpost in the wilderness very soon. |
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Bookworm
Colonial Militia
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
February 10 2004
Status: offline
Donating Member |
Posted - May 09 2004 : 1:31:49 PM
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| I agree with everything Scott and WW have said. Life sometimes takes us to places we were certain we'd never go. I've been there too, although without kids. I think you're going through this difficult time with courage and grace, Rich, and no doubt Elaine is too. You've given so much to everyone in Mohicanland -- you've given us Mohicanland! -- so the very least we can do is carry on while you rest (as much as you can with that schedule) and regroup. Take care, Sachem. |
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SgtMunro
Soldier of the King
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
September 23 2002
Status: offline
Donating Member |
Posted - May 09 2004 : 2:07:04 PM
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Dear Sachem,
I've been there once before myself, and it ended in the divorce from my first wife. As the above friends have already said, and quite well too, there are no words of comfort or condolance. I can offer you my prayers, for the both of you and your children. If you need to talk, you have all my contact info, I can provide a sympathetic ear...
Your Most Humble Servant,
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Serjeant-Major Duncan Munro
Capt. Thos. Graham's Coy.
42nd Royal Highland Regiment of Foote
(The Black Sheep of the Black Watch)
"Nemo Me Impune Lacessit"
-Or-
"Recruit locally, fight globally." |
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Carter
Colonial Militia
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
August 28 2003
Status: offline
Donating Member |
Posted - May 09 2004 : 4:20:00 PM
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I wish both you and Elaine peace and comfort. Although I have not met either of you yet, I have grown to appreciate that you are both good people, and what you go through to keep this group and board going...
Rich, hang in there! I cannot imagine how difficult this has been for you, but you can count on my support. |
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securemann
Deerslayer
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
July 08 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 09 2004 : 11:15:50 PM
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| Things will work out.You guys are strong.Like the sarge said:"you got an ear here". |
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Christina
Deerslayer
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 27 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 10 2004 : 11:24:43 AM
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Rich, I'm glad you shared this with all of us. You and Lainey are strong people with strong convictions and no doubt will come through this, but please know both of you are in my thoughts and prayers. I can identify a bit with your situation as right now my best friend and mother of my two godsons is separated from her husband, who is also a good friend of mine, and I am helping her through the situation and keeping them in thoughts and prayers as well. Please know "you've got a friend" in Columbia and a bunch of 'em here at the Mohicanboard. Stay strong, Sachem.
Christina |
See this face? This is the face of a woman on the edge.
Whoopi Goldberg, "Jumping Jack Flash"
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Jayne
Overseer of Ariel's Auction
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 23 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 10 2004 : 2:48:11 PM
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Rich,
You already know - my thoughts are continually with you, Elaine and your kids. You take care of yourselves.
Jayne |
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Jo
Sweetser 4 Rep
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 27 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 11 2004 : 5:26:04 PM
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Rich,
Not the "Sunday Update" that one would look forward to reading; my prayers and thoughts are with you and Elaine and family.
Take care.
Your friend,
Jo |
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Dances with Beagles
Colonial Settler
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 19 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 11 2004 : 7:06:09 PM
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Wow. As if you haven't had enough to deal with.
I'm really sorry to hear that you have separated. I hope that all of you find some source of strength and comfort, whatever the outcome. And please know that there are many of us in Mohicanland who think about and pray for you.
Nancy |
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richfed
Sachem
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 13 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 12 2004 : 06:09:29 AM
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Not to say this is easy. Not to say it doesn't hurt. Not to say that there isn't a feeling of failure lingering deep within ...
... but ...
Lainey & I talked a bit this past Monday. We're both OK. We both love each other. Sometimes, that isn't quite enough. Weird, but we just could not make each other happy.
Not to worry, Scott! Thanks, everyone ...
... and so it goes. |
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Bill R
Colonial Militia
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
July 03 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 12 2004 : 11:33:02 AM
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Well, I for one am very saddened to hear of this.
Been quite a while since I last visited, but something caused me to visit today. Rich and Elaine - one constant of Mohicanland - one thing that always seemed to remain the same - one steadying influence and one thing that was always to be counted on WAS Rich and Elaine. The team that made Mohicanland what it was. Now, Mohicanland great as it is and large as it has become for many folks, is after all an internet venue. Taking all that away still leaves the constant of Rich and Elaine - a couple who have birthed and raised children, made journeys together, backed each other through all adversities and difficulties, spent many years together as man and wife, partner and friend, last refuges of consolation and comfort, students of life, and adventurers in intellectual pursuits.
Never, never would it have occurred to me to think of you two as anything but one. I have seen so many things changing in this lifetime of 57 years, but I never would have imagined a change in the image of Rich and Elaine as one. My prayers are that you two will work things out and become again that image of one-ness.
Good luck and God bless your finding the answers. |
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caitlin
Bumppos Tavern Patron
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 17 2002
Status: offline
Donating Member |
Posted - May 12 2004 : 12:23:06 PM
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Rich,
I know you are busy, but I hope that you recieved my email to you.
I just wanted to reiterate that you are in our thoughts and that we are here for you & Elaine, if you ever need an ear.
Stay strong - 
your friends,
Caitlin & Jeff
p.s. Bill, good to see you back! |
Jack McCall: "Should we shake hands or something, relieve the atmosphere. I mean how stupid do you think I am?"
Wild Bill Hickok: "I don't know, I just met you."
"A nation with no regard to it's past will have little future worth remembering."
A.Lincoln
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize that they were the big things"
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Cherie
Colonial Settler
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
July 02 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 13 2004 : 09:06:12 AM
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No Words really can be said. Just know your in our thoughts and prayers.
Now on a different note. Can you tell me what part of Candler you are residing in? I grew up there. Lived off of Monta Vista Rd for over 12 years. My dad lived there for over 20 years. It was a great area then. Loved it. |
Support our Country, our President and our Troops |
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Fitz Williams
Colonial Militia
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 19 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - May 13 2004 : 1:08:16 PM
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| Speaking of Candler, it is the home of Jim Chambers. There are some mighty fine guns in that part of NC. |
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richfed
Sachem
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 13 2002
Status: offline
Administrator |
Posted - May 13 2004 : 8:04:34 PM
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Jim Chambers? The lock guy? I'll have to look into that ... for sure!!!
Cherie, I live on Standhill Drive ... it's down past the Upper Hominy Rescue Squad building heading right toward Mount Pisgah on Highway 151.
Yep ... Caitlin ... got it!!! Thank you & thank you all of you for your very kind words ... here & in PM's/E-mail. |
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Dillon1836
Deerslayer
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
July 17 2003
Status: offline
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ccorner
Pathfinder
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
February 05 2003
Status: offline
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Posted - May 14 2004 : 10:21:40 PM
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Rich,
I haven't been on this site nearly as long as others. I have to agree with the others' though in that it is a painful thing to go through. Love is a fickle thing to be sure. Elaine, I am sure is feeling the difficulty of the situation as well. Couples do grow apart often. I will pray for your situation. Hope you will find comfort here as you have in the past.
ccorner |
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ardensgal
Pathfinder
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
June 12 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - June 03 2004 : 11:49:56 AM
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| We had no idea.. Eric and I visited you both back in Dec. I think. Like everyone else said.. Our thoughts are with you both and your kids.. Comfort and peace. |
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Donna
Colonial Settler
USA
Bumppo's Patron since [at least]:
May 17 2002
Status: offline
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Posted - June 03 2004 : 12:21:03 PM
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Dear Rich,
So sorry to hear this news. Life can be a very rocky road.
If it's any consolation my parents separated when I was a teenager.
They were both happier living apart. My Father was still a part of
our lives. He was included on Sundays, Holidays, Weddings, etc...
I hope you and Elaine will find happiness whether it's being apart
or getting back together.
Good luck to both of you.
Donna |
Been onboard since 1998.
"Push hard, 'cos you got to clear the French outpost by dawn." |
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